The Truth Really Does Set You Free...

We all hate being lied to.  When someone stretches the truth, builds fiction around some granule of fact, or straight-up lies, there’s a feeling of betrayal that strikes at the heart.  We’ve all been there:  you’ve asked someone something and the response just doesn’t “ring true.”  We can usually sense deep down when someone is trying to pull the wool over our eyes.  People who lie actually prevent real relationships from forming.  Because how can you build a real relationship with someone who isn’t honest?  All of these things are pretty much givens.  I’m not saying anything profound, but I’ve been giving a lot of thought to good old honesty lately.  I try to live an honest life with my friends and family.  But (to be honest) I’ve found that I’m evasive when I am afraid of hurting someone’s feelings.  I’ll find a way to skirt an issue or duck around the truth if I think the truth might cause hurt feelings, misunderstandings, or a conflict.  I’m beginning to rethink this façade of kindness.  Though it seems kind and protective of me (at least as I try to justify it in my own mind), it’s actually harmful.  I'm preventing the relationship from being genuine and open.  And who wants a relationship that isn't real?

I also started wondering just how honest I am with myself.  How often do I lie to myself and actually believe it?  Sometimes I fear that I have been so eager to please others that I don’t fully know what I want or think for myself. 

I happened across Luke 16 this week, and verse 10 really struck me:  “One who is faithful in a very little is also faithful in much, and one who is dishonest in a very little is also dishonest in much.”  Little lies lead to bigger lies, and pretty soon the truth is caked over with heavy layers of uncertainty.  I think, though, that truthfulness is powerful, and just as one lie can lead to another and another, truth can multiply and grow and become effortless and freeing. 

When I “let it all hang out,” my relationships are deeper.  I am not hiding anything.  I am trusting those I care about to love me no matter what, and I am allowing them to see me in the full light of day.  I'm also inviting them to be honest with me.  We all know that the best friends on earth will tell us the truth (and also when we have something stuck in our teeth).  And while sometimes the truth does indeed hurt, it doesn’t always have to be brutal.  The more I strive for honesty even when I’m afraid it might cause conflict, the lighter my heart feels.